Starting nursery – a parent’s reflection

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Taking your little one to nursery is a huge step. It often signifies the end of maternity leave and will be the place where your child will spend a lot of time.

I dropped my baby to his nursery intro’ session yesterday and as I drove away I felt content. I was prepared for the surge of emotions I was told that I would feel, but this didn’t come. I was also prepared for tears but instead, I was happy.

In the back of my mind there was the voice that whispered ‘what if he doesn’t like it?’ and ‘what if he doesn’t make any friends?’ but I didn’t listen and remained positive.

This lack of sadness isn’t because I was relieved I didn’t have to look after him for two hours – honestly, I do enjoy it as hard as it can be sometimes! But it was because I felt in control of the situation.

I had chosen the nursery based on how I felt when I went in. The children were happy as were the workers. The baby room was set out beautifully and there was always an activity they could get stuck into, as well as plenty of play and themed story times. There was also a sensory room for the babies to relax in if they get overwhelmed at any point and a relaxing nap space.

Bertie’s specific carer was lovely and spent time going through what his normal routine would be and answering my questions regarding meals, naps, and everything else.

I know the nursery will work to the latest guidance and is completely baby-proofed. So Bertie will have a full day of fun, plus 3 healthy meals, and plenty of love and care.

So I wasn’t sad because I knew he would love it and in time, eventually he will be asking to go to nursery!

It also gives me an opportunity to grow my career and earn an income for my family. Yes, childcare is expensive but I really do believe the benefits outweigh the cost cons. It also means that when he does see family, it’s a nice change rather than having to rely on them for childcare.

Some questions I asked when viewing nurseries are listed below:

⁃ Do the children have free access to water and drinks?

⁃ Are nappies, wipes and formula provided?

⁃ Do you need to provide bedding for nap times?

⁃ What safeguarding is in place for pickups?

⁃ Do we get notification of what activities the babies have been up to throughout the day?

⁃ What is a normal menu?

⁃ Are there any parents evenings or catch-ups with your child’s carer?

⁃ What outdoor activities are available?

Slow Living

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If you read my previous post, you’d understand that right now I am in a period of change.

I’m making an effort to live in the moment and reduce my social media exposure. So far, so good! I’ve been offline for over a week now and feel pretty positive about it.

So to extend this good feeling, I want to try and slow down in everyday life.

I’ve been doing some research and would like to implement elements of hygge into my lifestyle. To begin with, just slowing down and simplifying my days will be enough. It’s a big change – jumping off the hamster wheel and deciding to slow down and go against everything we are told is true. Such as chasing the career, having the modern home, the best clothes and possessions.

I’m stepping away from this. I’m buying secondhand, cooking local food from scratch, reading more, scenting my home and spending quality time with my family and friends.

I want my boy to grow up living in the moment and not always being glued to a screen. Once he is old enough, I want him to choose a lifestyle that has a healthy balance of work/life, indoors/outdoors – and my lifestyle will hopefully be a positive influence on his own.

One quick and easy element of hygge I’m trying to incorporate is to connect with friends and family more. Making time for good conversation and not just a quick text here or there.

Let’s see how this next week develops.

The flaws of social media

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The content of this post is original to me, but undoubtedly you will have seen these reasons listed before. I’ve been doing a lot of thinking recently and have hit ‘refresh’.

For a very long time, I have come to realise that I was entirely too obsessed with social media. Particularly a certain photo sharing app. Whenever I would open my phone I’d immediately open Insta’ as habit. Then I would mindlessly scroll through the best bits of other people’s lives and subconsciously compare them to me.

Often I was doing this when I was feeling tired or lonely – so the other lives I was being shown would seem perfect, yet unattainable.

But recently I had a epiphany. Which is highly simple but to me it was a revelation.

If I just didn’t use the app then I wouldn’t be comparing myself to these influencers and other lives that I’m not living.

So I’ve deleted the apps. It’s currently been 48 hours social media free (not long I know but for me it’s a record!) and my brain feels a lot lighter. I’m focusing on the tasks at hand, having fun with my baby and reading, chatting or watching television with my other half in the evenings.

This morning, I’ve done cleaning, laundry, gardening and I’ve also picked some fresh flowers from the garden to display in the house. Before I would have just scrolled through TikTok!

A new start: designing the Mum that I want to be

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I’ve been absent from my blog for a while now. After giving birth in November, motherhood hit me and I just have not got a chance to sit down and put my feelings into words. But here I am. I’ve found a little time and I’m attempting to put my creative hat on.

Motherhood – quite honestly the hardest, most stressful but most rewarding ‘job’ I’ve ever had. It’s like two full time jobs thrown together that you never get a break from. Not until your hormones have stopped making you feel guilty every time you leave your baby with a family member or even their dad. Until those crazy hormones subside, you just don’t switch off.

Now my boy is 6 months old, I’m making an effort to find ‘me’ again. Old Abii has gone and I couldn’t imagine myself not being a Mum, but I now get to create new Abii – a healthy balance of ‘Mummy’ and me.

Everyday now, I’m making the effort to do something that makes me feel more glamorous than just throwing on leggings, a baggy t shirt and hair into a bun. I’ve bought some new dresses and have decided to wear them, not just save them for date night or lunch out. I’ve started painting my own nails (I miss being able to have my gel nails – but maternity money means it’s a no no) and also putting on a little makeup. It’s amazing how much of a difference this makes to me mentally.

I’ve also said to myself to start thinking like the woman I want to be in a years time. As in, start creating mental habits that will stick for when my body catches up!

I make the effort to exercise everyday, ideally outside with Bertie and the dog. I drink a bottle of water everyday. I incorporate fruits and veggies into every meal we eat. I’ve cut down on naughty treats and chocolate/ice cream.

I’ve also started working towards my dream career by freelancing for a marketing company – investing time into my own skills so I can afford a comfortable lifestyle for our family.

Doing all of this is hard. It’s a lot harder than just grabbing a chocolate bar and just letting the dog walk herself around the pony paddock – which I unfortunately spent a few too many months doing.

What I’ve learnt is that to accomplish everything above, effective time management is key. In motherhood, your whole day revolves around feed times and wake windows so not over planning your day to start with helps with the load. I try not to book us any back to back activities as I know I just feel knackered afterwards. Something that wouldn’t have bothered me before.

So with my new healthy outlook and the start of my new lifestyle habits – this Homebird is going to be using her blog space to stay accountable.

Connect with me and let me know your thoughts – mamas I would love your help with my journey!

Inspire: Be Inspired

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The reason I created Habits of a Homebird was because I felt there was an audience out there that didn’t quite fit with the typical “country girl” persona. I’m a horsey girl who has evolved into a country bumpkin; something that has happened organically through my lifestyle choices, environment and the people I surround myself with.

I am actually sat here editing this post at 7:30am on a very drizzly and grey Monday morning; yet, I know that this is the time I am most inspired.

My goal for this article is to reach out and help my readers figure out when they’re most productive. My homebird community is all about bringing likeminded people together and I truly believe your most productive time should be used to invest in yourself. I’d love to hear your thoughts so comment, share and tag me in! 

To inspire, you must first be inspired, a circular idea that always starts with you putting down your own ideas and somebody taking initiative from what you’ve written. You may then read somebody else’s ideas and be inspired to create your own and so it goes. Surrounding yourselves with people who inspire you frequently is so important for self-development and it will motivate you. So start putting your ideas down on paper and slowly build up the courage to share them with others.

Another thing you should know is that to write blog articles, one doesn’t sit down only once and a perfectly formed piece will emerge. I’m always jotting down notes on my iPhone and usually in the morning before work, I will sit at my laptop with a cuppa and start putting down my ideas. The first draft will often take a couple of days and then editing a few more days if I am concentrating solely on that creative task. If I am juggling multiple projects then this often takes longer. So don’t be put off if your own creativity takes time – you’re not on your own!

Anything can be an idea! If I go out for the day with my camera, I will often write about my adventures. If I have a eureka moment in my equestrian training, I will most likely write about it. But also, if I come across some handy tips that I feel could benefit those around me, I will share those as well. I take inspiration from everything around me so making sure my surroundings are interesting and positive is crucial. If you’re stuck with your own creativity, I urge you to look at your circle and make edits. Hopefully, your creativity will then blossom.

Frumpy to fabulous

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Over the last month I’ve been experimenting with ways to improve my lifestyle choices and in turn, lose weight.

For a long time I’ve been unhappy with how I look and haven’t felt confident. I would wear yard clothes, work uniform or baggy jumpers yet have lots of Summer dresses sat in my wardrobe gathering dust.

On the 21st June, I sought advice from my closest friend who had personal training experience and my new lifestyle began. Now I’m not going to exaggerate anything in this post. I want it to be an honest article to help NORMAL people lose weight in a NORMAL way around work and a social life. No fancy diets or magic here I’m afraid and you won’t be shifting 10lb in a week. These are steps I have taken to kickstart my frumpy to fabulous journey and I’m living proof they’re working.

So here we go. I’d love to hear your thoughts at the end!  

An open attitude

Honestly, the best thing to adopt before any kind of weight loss journey is an open attitude. If you’re stuck in your ways with food or exercise you need to accept that to lose weight you will have to make changes. I did and it was difficult but so far I don’t think I could go back to my lifestyle before. Having an open attitude and looking at the journey positively will help you progress; remember, the start of the journey is you at your heaviest so try to not get bogged down about your starting figure. Mine was my heaviest weight by far but 4 weeks in, I feel less frumpy and more energetic, even if I don’t look much different on the outside!

Spices

The more spice you throw on food, the tastier it is. The tastier it is the more you enjoy it. The more you enjoy it the less you feel like you’re dieting. This is how I’m looking at food now! I was stuck in a rut making the same dinners so to experiment with herbs and spices was one step towards making new meals. I headed straight to Aldi to stock up as they’re super cheap and have a wide variety of spices and flavourings, as well as fresh herbs and herb plants for your kitchen windowsill.

Portion sizes

Looking back, I think my worst enemy was always portion sizes. I was never one for weighing food and once the food was on my plate I wouldn’t like to leave it or “waste it”. I started off by weighing my cereal and it was so upsetting that my usual portion size was literally double the recommended serving. Another example was when I would make a recipe from a cookbook and weighed out pasta to use, again it was half the amount I would have pre-lifestyle change. Getting this under control was difficult the first couple of days but after that my body seemed to adjust.

Water intake

Following on nicely from the point above, I’d always have water with my meal. I’d been told that quite often when you’re stomach feels empty it is often due to dehydration and to take a big drink of water. Well, I’m now drinking approximately 3 litres of water a day and can just about curb the snack cravings!

Alcohol-free zone

One of the most difficult decisions was to give up alcohol whilst I was trying to lose weight. Now, I come from a family of alcohol appreciators and not having wine, prosecco, gin or cider in the house was considered a dire emergency. I also recently purchased a crate of wine of Laithwaites that I hadn’t quite finished, so I had to hide the last bottles at the back of the cupboard. Alcohol is empty calories and as my body only needed about 1600 calories a day to maintain weight, let alone lose any, I didn’t have ANY calories to spare. So, since the 21st June I have only drank water or tea but a positive is that my skin has cleared up nicely. However, I did break this rule for my birthday but didn’t go too crazy!

Balsamic vinegar

I never knew how delicious this stuff was until I started using it to cook with. Throwing it over a steak whilst it is cooking adds so much flavour or it’s great to jazz up a salad. Farm shops have some fantastic selections and I’ve currently got a balsamic and orange vinegar to try from the brand new Elliott’s Farm Shop near Weedon.

Low fat spreadable cheese

I’m a cheese lover and between Dan and I we used to go through 2 blocks a week. Not great for the waistline! However, low fat spreadable cheese is great on crackers or Ryvitas and I still feel like I’m getting my cheese ‘hit’. I also fell in love with Parmesan, an equally cheesy substitute that you don’t need much of for flavour.

The Body Coach’s cookbooks

I’ve had these books for a few years now but never really paid much attention to them until I decided to start my new healthier way of living. However, once I opened them and saw how easy the recipes were, I never looked back! I’ve had cookbooks before where you have to buy lots of hard-to-find ingredients that could be expensive. They also only included recipes that take a while to prepare – something I found tedious fitting in around work and sorting the horse. Yet, the Shift, Shape and Sustain cookbooks from Joe Wicks are SO easy. As explained above, I stocked up on spices and coconut oil and now adapt the recipes so both Dan and I will eat them (he is much fussier than I am). We’ve had steak, meatballs, paella, sausages, pasta dishes and all of them are made with a healthier lifestyle in mind. I often share my own attempts of these dishes on my Instagram stories and highlights so have a look for some dinner inspiration.

Low calorie ice cream!

I LOVE ice cream. I knew this was one thing I couldn’t give up so had to research (as in taste test) quite a lot of the low-calorie ice creams on offer. The protein ice creams I didn’t particularly like as the texture of them wasn’t quite the same as normal ice cream. However, the Moophoria range from Ben & Jerry’s and also the Graham’s Goodness range found in Aldi are both delicious! The tubs are between 300-500 calories each and each will last me 3-4 days. The salted caramel Grahams Goodness flavour is particularly delicious.

At the point of writing this blog I had lost 4.2kg in weight just from these changes. I endeavour to lose more and will be sharing the progress over on my Instagram feed. I’d love to hear your thoughts so either comment below, on my Instagram post of feel free to DM me.